My body, that strange
It’s Monday, the day of the challenge of My Beauty. For this new challenge, My Beauty, like many people on Blogo was moved by the article by Charlotte-BB in his report to the body, and decided to do the challenge this week. And I find my faith this great idea!
I decided to answer questions from My Beauty, but in the sense that I think the most telling for me.
*** What parts of your face and your body would you change? Why?
If I was asked this question two years ago, I answered all or almost all. I know that My Beauty said “no flogging,” but that’s what I thought of me. I report to my body, and myself very hard, because the image I was sent to me a long time, and I returned to myself was not Folichon. I had never watched the girl that because she is pretty, nor was admired for its achievement. Secretly admired my friends, oddly always prettier and smarter than me, and I always looked with envy.
For my body, when I started having a few buttons, no ugly white buttons, but a bit of acne anyway, I started to prefer what I was before, smaller nickel skin , pretty thin … I always complexed on my stomach and my hips. My stomach still too round, swollen, not flat. These generous hips, too thin and in magazines. And my breasts too small, which is also the first place I lose weight, height of peak.
In high school, trying to hide my oily skin, another large complex of my life, I applied the cream colored, powder compact, free of mascara, eyeliner, short, I make up to try to love me. To me that remark, hoping not to have even a little compliment … it lasted for years, often putting myself I thought all that stuff in the figure, I put a mask to to hide, ProShape Rx to hide the low opinion I had of me.
Not seeing the state of my skin improved fat, following a remark of a boy I liked 5 years (platonic love) saying that he preferred natural girls, I just stopped gradually to do anything, put on my face. Of course it was in the hope of pleasing him, but it allowed me to stop hiding from myself and me.
Compliments I got. Throughout my life. But I have never believed it. Even today, when people say something positive, it makes me uncomfortable, I do not believe it. I tried to diet, sports, but I never managed to get the shape I wanted in the mirror. Why? -Because that silhouette, I have, I know, and it’s fashion and women’s magazines that makes me believe that I am not so fine.
I abused my body, I abused myself morally, I refused to believe the people who thought I was pretty, and it made me cold. One day my mom told me I was wrong. She would have wanted her to be blonde younger, and having my eyes. And on the street, boys looked at me, but my attitude was so cold that I drive them away. And yet, two years ago, a man spotted me and make me the happiest woman. Because when I look in his eyes, I would finally believe that I can be “pretty” or “good.” I know it’s cliche, but true. When I say I am very hard on myself, it is a truth that is able to stop me, including my work.
Of course, this helped me a lot too, is the choice of my favorite actress Liv Tyler, who refuses to yield to the dictates of Hollywood. After shooting the Lord of the Rings, he was offered a role if she lost 20kg (she was 72, he was asked to 52kg), his refusal had scored. A woman who takes her voluptuous forms in a world of slimming and beauty of glossy paper, I was proud of her.
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